


Good Enough for You

by FlightlessAngelWings



Category: The Punisher (TV 2017)
Genre: F/M, First Kiss, Fluff, Kissing, Love Confessions, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:41:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25131817
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FlightlessAngelWings/pseuds/FlightlessAngelWings
Summary: What happens when Reader shows up drunk at Billy's door?
Relationships: Billy Russo/Reader
Kudos: 18





	Good Enough for You

Well today was a shit day.

First, you were passed up for the promotion at your job after you busted your ass for weeks. You poured your heart and all of your free time into your job, and you were turned down in favor of Brad. Fucking Brad, who did the bare minimum and got all the praise in the world. Whatever, you would get over it after you’ve had time to cool off. Maybe it was the kick you needed to finally look for another job somewhere that would appreciate you more.

What really got to you though, was the phone call you got when you came home. As soon as you closed your door, the last person on the planet you wanted to talk to called: your mother. Calls from her were rare these days, but that was how you liked it. With a heavy sigh, you answered as prepared yourself to get chewed out for the next twenty minutes. You never had the best relationship with your mother, and the hurtful words she said to you as a child still haunted you to this day.

You finally hung up after what felt like forever as you fought back tears. Today was Friday too, it was supposed to be a good day. You let out a deep breath as you steadied your emotions and then you decided to go out to the bar for a drink. Or two.

“Fuck it,” you mumbled to yourself as you changed out of your work cloths and into your favorite pair of jeans and a nice top. If you were going to go out and get shitfaced, you were at least going to look good; you had to boost your confidence somehow. After a last glance in the mirror, you headed out to the bar.

This bar held so many memories for you, but you hadn’t been by in some time. It was a comfort place for you, so you kept it for special times, and it was just what the doctor ordered as a remedy for a rough day. You sat at the bar by yourself with your drink in your hand as you used the alcohol and your happy memories from here to cheer yourself up. After about four drinks, it started to work. 

By far the best memory of this place was when you met a certain someone. You had come here one night years ago with some friends when the most handsome man you ever saw came up to you. You thought it was a joke at first, or that you were hallucinating, because no one that good looking would actually have sought you out. The handsome stranger introduced himself as Billy Russo, and the two of you ended up talking until last call.

A smile came across your face as you thought about that night. Normally you would brush off advances from strangers, but something about Billy’s energy just pulled you to him. And he was so much more than just a pretty face too; he was smart, funny, and charismatic. Before he called a car for you, you exchanged numbers so you could keep in touch, which you did. After about a week of texting, you ended up at his place for the night.

That was the one and only time you had slept with Billy, and what a night that was. After that, you both tried to make things work, but things just weren’t going to fall into place for you two. You stayed friends, and you were grateful for that, but the more you talked to him, the more you fell for him. And you could tell that he didn’t feel the same way about you. He only saw you as a friend. So if that was how he stayed in your life, you told yourself you’d be satisfied with that.

But, the more you drank, the more the thought actually upset you. Maybe it was just something else to add to the pile today, but you found yourself longing for Billy in a way that you hadn’t let yourself feel in over a year. You looked around the bar, and you considered approaching someone random to take home for the night to forget about your troubles, but no one appealed to you.

You finished off another drink as you laughed at yourself. It wouldn’t be the first time you found yourself a Billy substitute. You flagged down the bartender for another drink to drown out your mind.

“Here you go dear,” the bartender said as he set the glass down, “But this is your last one. I’m cutting you off.”

You answered him with a pout, but you knew he was right. You had been sitting at that bar for hours, and you lost track of how many drinks you had. Oh well, it’s not like you got like this often. So you finished your drink, set your money down at the bar and set out into the night. Maybe the many drinks did go to your head, because when you flagged down a cab, the address you gave was not your own.

A knock at the door made Billy jump out of his thoughts. He glanced down at the corner of his laptop to check the time to find it was around 1:00 am. With furrowed brows, he put the computer down and went to open the door only to be met with your glazed-over face. You leaned against the frame, and could barely hold yourself upright.

Billy gave you a soft, but subtly devious smile, “Had a good night I take it?” he teased as he let you in.

“Hope I didn’t wake you,” you tried to keep yourself from slurring, but you couldn’t tell how good a job you did at that.

“Nah, just doing some work,” he motioned over to the open laptop on the coffee table as he guided you over to the couch, “Let me get you some water. You smell like a liquor store.”

“You like it,” you retorted with a wink as you let yourself collapse down onto his luxurious couch. You heard him chuckle but you couldn’t make out what he said after that since the moment you sat down, your head started to spin. You closed your eyes and leaned back until you heard the sound of glass on the table.

“You alright there?” he ended with your name and sat down next to you.

“Fine,” you mumbled before you reached for the water and chugged all of it.

“That is a familiar sight,” he teased.

Once you finished the water, you felt so much better. It wasn’t enough to sober you up, but it at least helped the room to stop spinning, “Thanks,” you couldn’t meet his gaze as you gently set the glass back down. You let out a deep exhale as all the feelings you tried to bury suddenly came rushing back.

Billy said your name to get your attention, “Everything alright? You look like you have a lot on your mind,” he asked once you finally turned to look at him. He couldn’t quite place the look on your face, but it was strange for you to not look him in the eye.

“Fine,” you answered too quickly. You paused for a moment before you let out a heavy sigh as Billy continued to stare at you, unsatisfied with your answer, “Rough day.”

“You want to talk about it?”

You looked into his dark eyes as if you were looking for the answer to an unasked question in them. When you didn’t say anything, Billy said your name again, but this time it was in a much softer tone. That was all it took for you to break.

“Why am I never good enough?” you finally said, your voice cracking.

“What?” Billy was thrown with the question, “Who said that?” he moved to put his hand on your thigh to try to comfort you.

“I’m never good enough. For anyone,” you raised your voice without meaning to, “I got passed up again for the promotion at work, even though I busted my ass off for it. Then, I had to listen to my mother tell me for the thousandth time that I’m a disappointment and how much I let her down…” your voice fell off as the tears you tried so hard to keep back fell down your cheek. You slumped forward and buried your face in your hands.

Billy didn’t know what to say, so he just rubbed your back and let you cry it out. When he finally opened his mouth to say something, you cut him off without meaning to.

“I’m not even good enough for you,” you said.

That made Billy’s mouth drop open, “What? Wh-when did I ever say that?”

You dropped your hands, but you didn’t turn to face him, “You didn’t say it exactly, but I can tell. Why else wouldn’t we have worked out?” you glanced over your shoulder at him before you continued your drunken ramble, “I mean, I’m absolutely falling for you, but I know you don’t feel the same way about me. And I mean, why would you? You’re so out of my league it’s not even funny. You don’t have to say the words for me to know that I’m not good enough for you,” with that, you tried to stand back up but you were still completely trashed, so you quickly lost your footing.

Billy was fast to react, and leapt up to catch you in his arms. He held you up with a strong grip as you clutched onto his shirt. Neither of you said anything, and your tears stopped themselves as you looked into his eyes. 

“I should go,” you said after several moments of silence. You tried to break out of his grip, but Billy held you firmly in place.

“I’m not letting you back out on the street when you’re like this,” he told you in a firm voice that left no room for negotiation. 

You stayed still in his arms, and neither of you tried to move at all. Your eyes glanced down to his lips and before you realized your own movements, you placed your lips on his. Billy leaned into the kiss at first, but he broke it off before it went too far.

“You’re drunk,” he said your name again, “I don’t want you to do anything you’d regret. And I can’t go taking advantage of beautiful drunk women now can I?”

You didn’t seem to react to his words, and Billy chucked it up to how wasted you were. So without another word, he scooped you up into his arms and carried you to his bedroom. You stayed silent, and he figured you passed out when he picked you up.

And you did for a moment. The warmth and strength of his grasp was comforting, and in your alcoholic haze, you instantly fell asleep. You only woke up when you felt your body shift again. A chill ran up your body when you felt the loss of contact, and you let out a little whine.

“Sleep,” he whispered, “I’ll take the couch,” he touched your head tenderly.

“Stay? Please,” you opened your eyes enough to see him stand over you.

Billy let out a sigh, but what you couldn’t see was the hint of a smile on his face, “Alright,” and with that you felt the bed shift as he settled in next to you.

Once you felt the warmth of his body next to you, you instantly fell back asleep. The covers didn’t even make it up past your waist before you let them go and went limp. Billy watched you sleep for a few minutes to make sure you were still breathing before he pulled the blanket all the way up to tuck you in. He brushed his fingers over your face as he admired you.

“If you only knew,” Billy spoke softly before he laid himself down next to you. How nice it felt to sleep next to you again.

The sunlight on your face woke you up the next morning, and you immediately felt the effects of your binge from the night before. You groaned as you rolled over, or tried to. A weight around your midsection kept you pinned down. Confused, you looked around and realized that you were not in your apartment. Nor were you wearing any more than your undergarments.

Oh no.

Slowly, you turned your head and you couldn’t hide your surprise when you saw who slept next to you. Billy was still asleep, and he had an arm wrapped around your waist. You jumped with a gasp, which startled him awake. Immediately, Billy went from fast asleep to full alert.

“What’s wrong?” He asked as he inspected your face. 

You took a few deep breaths to calm yourself down. It didn’t help that you noticed then that Billy did not have a shirt on. You felt your face heat up and you buried your face in your hands, “Oh no,” you mumbled.

He laughed, “Don’t remember last night, do you?”

You shook your head, but did not lift it from your hands, “No,” you looked up at him after another deep breath, “What did I do?” You asked him with sad, pathetic eyes.

“We didn’t have sex if that’s what you’re asking,” he replied in a light-hearted tone, “Although you wouldn’t have said no,” he added with a wink.

You felt your face heat up and you collapsed back into the sheets in embarrassment, “I’m sorry.”

Billy placed a hand on your shoulder, “Don’t be. I’m glad you ended up here instead of God knows where,” when you didn’t answer he continued, “I’ll go make coffee, and I’ll get you some aspirin for the headache I’m sure you’ve got right now. Feel free to grab one of my T-shirts, I’m sure it’s more comfortable than the top you wore last night.” With that he slid out of bed and out of the bedroom.

Once you were sure you were alone, you sighed heavily. “Fuck,” you whispered to yourself. How did you end up here? The last thing you remember was sitting at the bar alone, wallowing in self pity, then you got a cab home. Or at least you thought you did. Maybe your wandering mind acted on it’s own and drunk you didn’t resist the urge to see Billy. 

The more you tried to wrack your brain, the more your head hurt. With a groan, you rolled out of Billy’s bed and picked up one of his shirts that he had laid out. Your jeans were on the floor, and you figured you must have taken them off when you got into his bed. Once you were dressed, you slowly made your way out into the kitchen.

You shielded your eyes from the light as you made your way through the penthouse. Was it always this bright in here? 

“Morning sunshine,” Billy’s painfully cheerful voice broke through your misery.

“Must you be so loud?” You winced as you sat down at a stool on the kitchen island and crashed your head down to the cool marble.

“Sorry I couldn’t help it,” he spoke in a softer voice, but you could still hear the chuckle behind it. “Here,” you heard the sound of something being pushed across the counter.

You peaked up to see a glass of water and two pills in front of you. “Thanks,” you mumbled as you took them and drained the glass. Once you set it down, Billy placed a hot cup of coffee in its place. You stared at it with furrowed brows before you asked, “What happened last night?”

Billy’s face dropped, “You showed up at my door drunk at 1 am,” he said simply.

You clenched your jaw. You could tell he was holding something back, but you also didn’t want to push it. You caused enough trouble for him as it was, “Sorry,” you said sheepishly. 

“Hey, I already told you it’s fine. You seemed like you needed a friend anyway,” Billy’s voice was lined with compassion, and it made you wonder what you said to him.

“I had a bad day yesterday, and I went to drink my sorrows away,” you explained.

He nodded, “You did mention your work and your mother.”

“I did?” You tried your best to bring your memories back. As you sat there with your face scrunched in concentration, everything suddenly came back to you. Your eyes went wide at the realization and you couldn’t hide your shocked expression.

Billy looked down sheepishly; he knew exactly what your face meant.

“Billy I’m so sorry,” you choked back a sob, feeling newly guilty, “I didn’t mean…”

“It’s fine,” he cut you off, his tone harsher than he meant it to be. When he met your eyes and saw the sadness there, he quickly corrected himself, “I didn’t mean to sound like that.” Billy came around the counter to sit next to you and he took your hands in his, “But let me tell you this: you absolutely are enough. You’re more than enough, actually.”

You bit your lip, “I should go. I don’t want to make things worse,” you tried to pull your hands away, but Billy kept his grip firm on your hands. “Billy,” you whispered as you looked at him with pleading eyes.

“Wait, just listen to me ok?” 

There was something in his voice that made your heart ache. You nodded and braced yourself for the most painful rejection of your life. 

“You and I have been friends for a long time,” he said your name so sweetly, “And I know we tried the whole relationship thing but we never quite got it right.”

You swallowed hard, but didn’t say anything.

“Don’t get me wrong, the sex was great,” he cracked a smile, “And I wish more than anything I could make it work.”

You looked at him in confusion at his emphasis on the “I” part. You always thought it was your fault you never worked as more than friends. 

“I know you said last night that you think you’re not enough for me. But that couldn’t be further from the truth,” Billy paused to let out a heavy sigh, “The truth is I’m not good enough for you.”

The gasp escaped your lips before you even registered your thoughts, “What?”

Billy looked at you like he was a lost puppy, and you’d never seen him look this vulnerable before. “I’m not the perfect man you think I am. I’ve done things I’m not proud of. I can buy you anything you want, yeah, but I can’t drag you into the dark part of my life like that. You’ll find things you won’t like at all. I can’t do that to you. I’ve been selfish enough to stay friends with you because I can’t stand the thought of not having you in my life at all, but you deserve better than me.” 

His thoughts echoed your own in so many ways, and his word hit you like a train. You never expected this at all. You squeezed his hands before you spoke, “I guess I’ve been selfish too, because I can’t bear the thought of not having you in my life either. And nobody is perfect, Billy. You and I both know that,” you paused and let out a sigh, “But where do we go from here now?”

Billy shrugged and looked down at your connected hands. The tension in the room was palpable as neither of you could think of what to say next. 

You shook one of your hands free to cup his face and make him look back at you, “Can I ask a favor of you?”

He nodded and swallowed hard; it was his turn to be nervous.

“Can you let me decide for myself who I think I deserve?” You let out a soft chuckle, “Maybe we are meant for each other, just since we both think the other deserves more.”

Billy cracked a half a smile as he leaned into your touch more. The room was silent for a moment, but this time it felt more comfortable. “Can I ask you a favor now?” He finally asked.

“Of course,” you replied softly as you gazed into his dark eyes.

“Can I kiss you?”

Your face slowly lit up before you nodded. Very tentatively, Billy leaned forward and placed his lips on yours. His free hand came to rest on your hip and he pulled you in even closer. The hand that you had on his face moved to behind his neck and you grabbed a hold on his hair. You soon deepened the kiss and parted your lips for his tongue, which he was happy to oblige.

Each of you dragged the kiss on for as long as possible. Both of your buried feelings and suppressed passions exploded in this kiss, and neither of you wanted it to end. When you finally broke away for air, you stayed as close as you could to him. You couldn’t help but smile at Billy, and he beamed back at you. Nothing in the world meant more to him than your smile, and he was happy to see it again.

“I should show up at your door drunk more often,” you quipped.

“How about I take you out for a drink instead? Maybe even dinner?” He replied with a raised eyebrow. 

“I’d like that,” you replied in a flirty tone. It turned out that your drunken mistake ended up being the best thing to happen to both of you. 


End file.
